This is not a post about mysticism but rather an observation of the profession that I love, library science. Librarians are often burdened with the stereotype of being either the wallflower or the wild person hiding behind the glasses.  Polar opposites at best, it is difficult to find a place in these very different roles for myself. In addition, librarians are an unusual bunch and the funny thing is that most know this.  I find it amusing to go to library conventions and people watch. What a fun group of people; quirky, unique, bright and intelligent with so many surprises under the hood.

“Librarians are the secret masters of the world. They control information. Don’t ever piss one off.”

Spider Robinson

Reflecting on this, I came up with some librarian confessions that reflect these stereotypes in my humble opinion.  As a former Catholic girl, confessions seemed appropriate when talking about all of the ways myself and others can go against the status quo in this profession. I hope you enjoy this as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Confessions

Terrible with grammar and spelling

I am a lover of the written word, but that does not equate to a lover of the rules of writing.  I must admit that I am absolutely terrible at grammar, which you may already have noticed.  In addition, if it were not for spell check, I would be doomed. Yes, I am the librarian that Google’s reference terms just for the spell check before moving to the library catalog to look for the book. Can you spell Tchaikovsky or Dostoyevsky free hand? Nope I didn’t think so. When I do finally get around to writing that novel, I will have to have a very good editor. My cousin Carrie would be on the top of my list as a beautiful writer in her own rite. Likewise, the only person I have ever known that has a memory like a steel trap and an eye for grammar is Marit, my friend since childhood. She would make an incredible librarian.

Not as detailed oriented as you would think

Surprise! Not all librarians are detailed oriented.  I can be when necessary, but I am more naturally a big picture person. Give me a project in which I have to focus on an excel sheet for half the day and my brain goes to mush. To keep me on task, I utilize an array of reminders both virtual and analog. Only a complex system can keep this one on task. If not for that I would be creatively thinking, writing, daydreaming or anything else that does not require massive amounts of my analytical brainpower.

Talking loudly in the library

This is a strange one.  I am shy in most instances, but give me a subject that I love and you can’t shut me up. I am also the one welcoming everyone at the front desk, asking about their families, kissing former students babies and musing about life in general. This type of interaction is what I love about my job; it is the relationships, not necessarily the daily work.   Part of my oversight is training all new student employees.  I tell them to lower their voices and not have lengthy conversations with friends at the desk and I am not a good example in this way. Sometimes I have to consciously walk away from the desk so that it does not become a chat fest.

We are good at making you feel welcomed

My job is welcoming patrons to the library. I take this very seriously.  I will learn your name, remember a few things that you have told me and make sure to get to know your library routine.  This is all in an effort to provide exceptional customer service. Inevitably, each year someone thinks I am flirting with them just because I was nice.  I don’t know what happened in their childhood in which they equate kindness with flirting, but this is exactly what happens. The awkwardness of it is unreal. Just know, I will smile when you walk in, say hello and be genuinely happy to see you in the library.  No, I will not go on a date with you. I don’t mix business with pleasure. The one time I did, it did not end well. See here for the crib notes on that epic stage of my life.

Dislike of random readers advisory

Don’t ask me for a new good book because I probably will not know.  When I tell people that I am a librarian they often jump right into what they have read along with a ramble about favorite authors …all the while I am standing there not knowing at all what they are talking about. I like MY authors and subjects, and do not follow all the new best sellers that are being made into movies at a nauseating rate. Talk to me about dance, music, mysticism, geology or historical fiction and I might know a thing or two.

Help me help you

When patrons run into the library five minutes before class and start rudely asking us to pull a pile of books, understand that your inability to plan ahead does not constitute an emergency on our end. Like wise, when we get a list of fifty reserve items on the first day of class, we will not rush them for you. We like to be helpful but that does not equate to jumping when you say jump.  We have commitments just like everyone else and to-do lists that get quite long.  Bring your patience and good manners and you will be surprised what we will negotiate for you.  We aim to please.

Refusing to be the secretary at committees

This one gets me every time.  Yes, librarians are usually the only ones to show up on time to committee meetings, patiently waiting for everyone else who inevitably arrives ten minutes late. Yes, we are the ones that usually schedule the meetings in the first place and send out the calendar reminders. This does not mean that we are automatically the official note taker or scheduler for every committee on campus. I never bring a laptop to a meeting, that would just be asking for trouble.

Copyright careless at times

This one is bad…very bad. Yes we are the holders of copyright knowledge for the campus and get asked about this often.  One, I am not a lawyer, so don’t ask me for legal advice about the entire book you scanned and put up online. Two, I always err on the side of access. Putting up content for the semester and then taking it down when the semester ends seems well within the realm of possibilities for me. We are an educational institution, not Amazon. Come on people, have some common sense.

Surrounded by strong opinions

Yup, we have them. Don’t assume just because I do not share them with you, that I don’t have strong opinions. Librarians are some of the strongest willed and opinionated group of people I have ever known. In fact, I avoid contentious discussions with my colleagues at all costs for this very reason. Not only will they argue a point, but after the fact I will receive a barrage of unsolicited research supporting this opinion. Treacherous territory, especially in an election year. So no, I will not show discomfort when you get a book about a politician that I dislike and you will not pull me into a debate about global warming.  I want so badly to say something, but I will be the consummate professional and keep my opinions to myself.

Colorful lives

This one catches the student workers every year.  Being a librarian does not preclude me from living my life in an out of the box way.  I have danced, raised children, gone to break dancing battles with my daughter (I am a great hip-hop reference librarian) and survived the entertainment industry. I grew up in a haunted house, worked at both SeaWorld and Disney in high school, audition for CATS when I was 15 and helped run a children’s book company. Shall I go on? People are interesting and being a librarian does not mean that we are living a bland, boring or head in book existence.

These are just some of my library confessions.  It is a profession that is never dull and allows me to learn something new everyday on the job.  Who wouldn’t like that!