We are all only on this earth for a set period of time, there are no take backs, do overs or restarts. Each moment that we have is precious and everything that we allocate our time to should be viewed as an exchange. We exchange this precious energy while choosing to participate in daily activities, commitments and relationships that we encounter in our lifetime. Once we view this contract as an exchange, it becomes more prudent that we choose wisely who and what we give this energy too.

 

“Life is what happens to us while we are making other plans.”

Allen Saunders

 

In our vocations and personal life a constant demand for time is the norm rather than the exception.  With technology accessible 24 hours a day, we are in a continual state of communication while achieving no real depth. I find it increasingly difficult to have real conversations about meaningful things that matter to me.  Small talk is not meaningful in a broader sense and is really just a pleasantry.  By the same token, academic speak is similarly dissatisfying.  The use of the biggest words to describe simple concepts is a display of ego that I could do without.

 

It is tragic how few people ever ‘possess their souls’ before they die… Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else’s opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation…”

-Oscar Wilde

 

If you have raised children you are well aware of how fast time moves in pace with the cumulative experiences of life.  It seems like only just yesterday when my two children were toddlers.  I simply cannot believe that they are both in their twenties and adulting to the best of their abilities. The only consolation I have in this rapid pace is that I did invest my life energy into their childhood and enjoyed every moment of it.  I have no regrets and have so many joyful memories. The choice to spend time with them rather than doing something for myself was easy, I always ended up reading them a book before bed, taking them to the park or letting them just be with me as I cooked in the kitchen.  In fact, some of our most intimate conversations were while driving in the car on the way to auditions, stuck in horrible Los Angeles traffic, a blessing in reflection.

 

Lost time is never found again.

Benjamin Franklin

 

With all this being said, why do we waste so much of our life energy on things of no consequence? We rush around, hardly acknowledging those that are important to use. Our to-do lists are longer than the time we actually have and we use busyness as a conversational point. I say “No” to this model. Certainly there are things that I am passionate about that pull at my schedule more than they should, but the trick is in the balance.  Asking oneself “what is the life cost of this venture?” By life cost, I am alluding to the time required to complete the venture. Nothing is ever free. Would it not better serve all of us if we evaluated this point more regularly with the understanding that being of service to others even in a small way is a good use of life energy and representative of a life well lived?  

 

I often think about what it must be like in the final days of life, to realize that the moment has passed and life was not lived in a way that was meaningful. How terrible it must be to have the knowing that so many opportunities have been missed. I am more than sure that on a deathbed very few if any have said “Gee, I wish I had made that final acquisition”, or “If only my bank account was bigger.”  I suspect that in the final moments of life most are reflecting on the more intimate moments.  Did I hug my loved ones when they were most in need, did I listen even when I was tired, did I offer my time and energy to those less fortunate.  If only we could live our lives in reverse things would be so clear. Use your life energy wisely, love deeply, connect with others in a soulful way and be of service when possible. Live as if tomorrow is never promised and today was your last.